Boys are not Dolls and Men are in Crisis

This will be all over the place and full of double standards, so brace yourself.

I recently had a very stern reaction to my daughter when I heard her ask her boyfriend if she could paint his nails and give him a facial.

I went off.

“That boy is not your girlfriend, bestie or sister and he is not a got damn doll. If you want a doll, I suggest you go to Amazon.com and buy you one. WTF is wrong with you?”

She looked confused and puzzled at my response to her “innocent” request.

She is not alone.

Girls and women all over are feminizing boys and men with their foolishness. Braiding hair, greasing scalps, doing facials, sitting in salt baths and the such.

The maddest I have ever seen her brother, is when she polished his toe nails in his sleep. She was about 5 and he was 11 and when he woke up and saw purple nail polish on his toes, he hit the roof!

HE WAS HELL HOT MAD.

I understood his position but I did not understand his anger.

Until now.

At 11, he was vehemently, aggressively and fiery rebuking the spirit that was coming to assault his masculinity in the form of his little sisters purple finger nail polish.

And he intuitively always had very strong reactions to certain behaviors.

He would not sit and watch Empire with us and to this day, refuses to sit and watch tv. He says it is counter productive to his purpose, his passion and his calling.

He is Music. A creative force. Energy. To sit and watch figments of another persons imagination is insulting to him. He mentors kids. He helps his community. He volunteers. He associate produces. He writes arrangements and works and gigs and ….runs a whole damn band!

He is busy ____________________m a n n i n g!

“Ma, I don’t do tv.”

“Ma, I do not do spa’s”.

But will allow me to treat him to an occasional pedicure.

“Ma, I do not talk about people. That is gossiping.”

Ma, I don’t care about what anyone else is doing.”

My son has Grown Ass Man Energy.

Too many boys and men are all into this frilly, girly, shit.

And the social media posts are out of control.

They have too much time and not enough man in their tank if they are commenting on who did what on the web, who put their dick where, who broke up with who.

Blah, blah, blah.

Nicca!

Get another job. Cut some grass other than your own. Build a well. Grow some trees. Catch some fish. Build a house. Fix some cars. Build some buildings. Teach some kids to read. Help some elders. Mentor some children. Get off your ass, turn off the television and stfu.”

It is too much to do for them to be engaging in business that does not pay them.

All over social media, writing about this and talking about that with dams broken in their lives, unpaid child support, abandoned children, neglected parents and forgotten elders.

With millions of boys in the system (juvenile, jail, foster care) how does any man have time to do anything other than address the crisis boys are in as a direct result of their dereliction of duty and neglect?

Not enough women are warring women and those of us who are, are tapped out raising the boys in our own households. We are already pulling triple duty while holding our villages together. We do not have the band width to volunteer at the local shelter or drive to the penitentiary on the weekends to pour into the life of Jamal.

We are already exhausted.

The current state of manhood is in serious trouble and if these “men” do not collectively spring into save a ho action, (their the ho) too many will sink into mani-pedi, bubble bath , soft life bliss, sporting pink nail polish, cuddling with their woman on the sofa, watching their favorite show.

With glitter on top.